It looks like I’m up for my third Nobel Prize for Science; I don’t know WHY I didn’t figure this out sooner!
Ladies, do you use shampoo in the shower? Well when I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body, and printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning,
“FOR EXTRA VOLUME AND BODY.”
…No wonder I’ve been gaining weight!
Well! I have gotten rid of that shampoo and I am going to start showering with Jif scouring cream instead, its label reads,
“DISSOLVES FAT THAT IS OTHERWISE DIFFICULT TO REMOVE.”
There, problem solved. You can thank me now. I wonder when I will get my Nobel Prize?