Fat Bottomed Girls

 

So I have a friend who works in the same block as me and he’s not only very tall but also somewhat heavily built, erm let’s be honest here and call a spade a spade, he’s fat.

And  over the years that I have known him he’s went through a whole string of girlfriends but every one I’ve met has been slim to skinny. I asked him about this – apparently being tactful is not my strong suite – and he says there are various practical reasons why he only dates slim woman.

First of all he doesn’t have a huge bed and when he did try dating someone more his own size they just felt cramped in the bed and like there wasn’t enough bed covers for both of them. Personally if I was Mrs Skinny Woman I’d be afraid of him rolling over during the night and crushing me! I also think that’s just an excuse, beds aren’t that expensive!

However, he did say something that made me laugh, when he was much younger he did date some woman who were his own size and you know what he said? He said that as he was (ahem) doing the dirty deed one – overwhelming thought crossed his mind and that was “Geez, I’m awfully high up here, I’d better watch out I don’t burn my backside on the ceiling light!”

I don’t know, I did laugh but then asked if he was in bunk (or boinking) beds and he laughed and said no but he did wonder if next time he should bring some mountaineering equipment and I’m wondering if that’s where the whole bondage fetish comes from..

There, I’m sure I’m going to get grief over this but hey, this is the sort of conversations we blokes have when no-one else is listening and I’m sure girls have much more interesting conversations 🙂

 

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