Cogito ergo sum.

I'm delighted to meet you two..

Mel Brooks once said “Look, I really don’t want to wax philosophic, but I will say that if you’re alive, you got to flap your arms and legs, you got to jump around a lot, you got to make a lot of noise, because life is the very opposite of death. And therefore, as I see it, if you’re quiet, you’re not living. You’ve got to be noisy, or at least your thoughts should be noisy and colourful and lively.”

I tend to strongly agree with him..

A few years ago I was in quite a mischievous mood,  and we had this chap come talk to the Christian Union here about his Box Jellyfish experience/conversion to God.. I went along to the talk, was interested to hear what he was gong to say but was more interested to see if anyone would question any of his story…

And first half was interesting enough, was very surprised at just how many were there, thought it might be a couple of dozen but there was about 150 there, didn’t know we had so many Christians here. Anyway, he was very entertaining, I do a lot of teaching/presentations to large groups and I’m always critical about everyone’s other delivery skills or lack of them but he had been doing this for 26ys and it was obvious he had well honed his delivery so it was interesting enough, he talked at length about getting stung and waffled on about begging for taxi drivers to take him to hospital and EVENTUALLY he got to the bit where he ‘died’ and he had what is known in the business as a NDE, a near death experience, went through tunnel of light, meet Jesus and glimpsed ‘Heaven’ before being given the choice of coming back to his body on earth.. All bog standard fare if you know anything about that sort of thang but then he opened the floor to questions…. and everyone asked smary suck up questions, trying to out-holy each other……

Except me of course…

Everyone else was very young (and naive) and I felt it was my duty to question everything, so I started off with the obvious “do you still go swimming in the sea…?” a nice easy funny question to break the ice, he said yes and I told him I thought he was pushing his luck! I did this with a smile just to set the tone but then I asked “you were lying in hospital, stuffed full of neurotoxins and your brain starved of oxygen, do you not think that what actually happened was that you were hallucinating…….?” which of course gives the bog standard but unprovable “If it had of happened to you then you would have no doubt that you were in the presence of Jesus”, completely unprovable but manna to the young Christians, so I asked another couple of easy obvious (to me but not that brain washed lot) questions and then thought it was time to have some fun so I asked “So you arrived at the end of this tunnel of light and Jesus was there having a friendly chat with you… would you have been shocked to be met by Mohammed…or Buddha or Richard Dawkins instead, are you implying that only Christians survive death, if I was a Muslim then would I have seen Mohammed at the end of the tunnel of light or does everyone – despite their religious background, meet Jesus…?”

Well, that set the cat amongst the pigeons, 150 students nearly fell off their seats, it was GREAT!, so me vs the entire room arguing about unchristian exclusivity,  the thing is that I don’t REALLY do it to wind them up, I do it to make them think, so many folk get brainwashed about how theirs is the only way and that’s how wars start and it annoys me intensely, and it was a bloody Medical School… of course someone is going to have very good medical knowledge and be able to call his account into question..we have a much better understanding of how the body reacts under stress and in extremes…

Anyway, we argued away for ages and then it was time to close and they all started doing this praying malarkey and ‘re-dedicating themselves to God” so I left at that point, oh and my parting statement was “Look guys, without a doubt God does exist and I’m not here to try to disprove that, what I’m here to do is to show you that anything and everything is open to question, don’t take everything as the gospel truth, God can take questions, what he has said here could be all hallucination due to jellyfish neurotoxin and extreme electrolyte imbalances, we don’t know enough even now about how the body functions in extremes and what protective measures we have so it may all have been a hallucination BUT conversely it may also all be true too… just please question things rather then swallowing everything hook, line and sinker..

… of course if I did the same thing in the Bible Belt then I’d probably be shot…

Yes, one way ticket to Hell… care to join me?

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