Life Instruction Manual – Chapter Three

Childless couples won’t be really aware of this but when your first child is born you are given an instruction manual. It’s quite a nice idea; out pops baby and you’re automatically given this manual to go along with it. Cool. It’s quite a weighty tome but the surprising thing is that when I looked […]

Father’s Day (part deux)

It’s ten o’clock, Sunday morning and I’ve just spend the last hour or so writing but also listening to my 12 and 14 year old boys rough-housing in the spare bedroom. They sleep – if sleep is the correct term- in a big king sized bed and it’s actually quite sweet to hear them laughing […]

Father’s Day 2011

When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years. Mark Twain It’s Father’s Day tomorrow (Sunday 19th June) and I will […]

Womenopause

So, I’m not sure what you lot think but I’m beginning to suspect ‘mother’ nature has designed us men to last only 50 years, I’m thinking this because I smashed a tooth this morning eating some muesli, plus I don’t seem to be able to hear as well when in a bar chatting away and […]

Oh, for foxs sake..

I believe raccoons can be a bit of a nuisance in some towns across America, I’m not sure just how far they have penetrated into the major cities but we have a similar problem, only it’s not with raccoons but with foxes..  I live in Tooting, SW London and if you look that up in […]

Assume crash positions

My two beastie boys, 14 and 12, live with me part time and one of the very secret delights of this living arrangement is that I get to hear them talking in their sleep. It’s not that often but occasionally I am awoken by the sounds of one of them laughing and I go into […]

Does my bum look big in this?

I try not to lie in life, I try my best to be honest and truthful even if I know in the short term it’s going to upset someone but I’m going to take this opportunity to tell my two boys that the most important lesson I can teach them is, somewhat ironically, to lie, […]

You never really lose them..

I’m reading a book at the moment, 101 Things To Do Before You Are Five, it’s hilarious but a lot of it is true, for example at #10; Pull daddies chest hair til he screams (check) and #8; Get mummy to ghost write your thank you letters (check) but it’s number two that interests me […]

Kick-Ass Jesuits

Had an interesting conversation last night with my two beasties, I usually pick them up after church and have them for the rest of the weekend but last night they were a bit late as the priest asked them to do Altar Service. They’ve done it lots of times before, the price they pay to […]